What caused you to get involved with CASA? I became aware of CASA when I became a foster parent ten years ago. I fostered to adopt two brothers and came to know their three female siblings in the process. As these children became more comfortable with and trusting in me, they revealed more details of their past family life and their experiences in foster care. The more I learned from them, the more I realized how badly broken the state child-care system was and still is. Caring for my adopted children became my first priority and has remained that until recently. My adopted children are now twenty-five and twenty four and launched into their own adult lives -- they no longer need as much of my time and attention. But what of other children with similar trauma and damage? I feel like I can help here. Secondly, I am acutely aware of the inspiration, guidance, and aid that I received from compassionate adults who were significant in helping me create the person that I have become. I would not be the person that I am without their interventions in my childhood and i will be forever grateful for their presence in my life. All of this caring humans have passed on now but I feel the need to honor them by paying their efforts forward to other children.
What has been the most rewarding part of being a CASA? As i have progressed through my volunteer training and now in my first case, I have become more enthusiastic about the work that CASA does. I have seen both of my CASA children brighten and grow from a trauma free kinship placement. I have been inspired by their uncle a single adult with no children of his own who has stepped up and unconditionally accepted the responsibility of raising these two children. I have been encouraged to see the Trust Based Relational Intervention concepts developed by Karyn Purvis and David Cross communicated and taught by CASA. I was fortunate to stumble upon this work early in my foster parent experience and it significantly improved my parenting approach and skills. However, perhaps the most rewarding part of being a CASA volunteer has been the support and interactions that I have had with the CASA administrators and staff that I have met. Every time I walk into that office, I leave with my "spiritual battery" recharged. I am fortunate to be working with Matthew Lopez as my Child Advocacy Specialist and I could not have designed a better support person for me. But, without exception, everyone in the office has been encouraging, supportive, empathetic, and beyond helpful. This is probably the best team experience that I have ever had.
What’s your favorite way to connect with your CASA kids? By far my favorite way is person-to-person contact. Consistently being in their life as a caring adult who is unconditionally interested in their safety and welfare is what these children have rarely experienced before. All of this is best communicated face to face so that non verbal communication can be perceived along with the spoken message.
Please share a special moment with us about your advocacy work with your CASA kids. One of the CASA children in my case is a five year old girl. Now in a safe routine living in a kinship placement, she is blossoming into a happy, playful little child. On my last visit with her and her brother she was reluctant to share my time with her brother younger brother. I asked her to wait and help me play with her brother before spending exclusive play time with her. She was very happy to be given the job of playing with her brother and me. I have previously discovered that she likes to be helpful and to be given responsibility. After playing with her, i was preparing to leave when she came up to me and tried to give me a full body hug which i turned into a side hug. She said, " I love you and I wish you lived here with us all the time."
Have you used a resource that you would like to share with other CASA volunteers? When I was parenting my adopted children the best resource that I found was The Connected Child by Purvis and Cross. It changed my approach to parenting and gave me some effective tools to deal with my boys. i was also able to gain some guidance and strategies from The Whole-Brain Child by Siegel and Bryson. From the list I obtained from CASA, I found and read The Connected Parent by Purvis and Qualls. I believe this would be a better source of TBRI concepts for most of our clients as the book puts emphasis upon the importance of knowing and caring for yourself as the parent of a child from rough places. All of us adults have experienced imperfect parenting in our childhoods and it is very important to identify and resolve lingering issues from our own childhood before attempting to help traumatized children deal with their own demons. Additionally, the age appropriate strategies that Siegel and Bryson present are very effective helping children (and ourselves) integrate the left and right brain functions with the logical and emotional sections of the human brain. I highly recommend all three of these books.
What would you say to someone that is on the fence about becoming a CASA? I would tell them why I do this work. I have seen traumatized children grow into adults trapped in self destructive cycles of attitude and behaviors because that is all they know. I have seen abused children become abusing adults because that is their normal, comfortable way of life. I have seen cycles of abuse, addiction, and neglect transfer from generation to generation in which victims become victimizers who prey upon their descendents. But I have seen individuals who were able to transcend their beginnings and break these negative cycles also. Our history is full of individuals who have overcome many obstacles to achieve great things. Usually they were able to do this because they had contact with compassionate, empathetic individuals who acted as sources of inspiration, encouragement, support, and knowledge. Significant individuals who provided the necessary qualities that enabled children from hard places to transform themselves into a much better version of themselves. None of these children are throw-away children; all could be salvaged and able to lead exemplary lives. Yet, to achieve this successful outcome, other humans must contribute unconditionally their time, energy, and effort to provide alternative paths. Today, there are too many traumatized children growing up around us and too few volunteers to reach all of these children. Too many abused children fall through society's cracks and pass their lifestyle on to their own children. In the end all members of society are affected by this. CASA is an organization devoted to helping children change their lives into more healthy, sustainable choices -- but there are not enough of us to reach most of these children. In the history of mankind on this earth, our individual life spans make up a brief moment or two at best but the effect of those lives can last much longer. One of the early life changing adults in my life was my great grandmother. Her death was almost seventy-five years ago, yet the lessons that she taught me continue to live on in me and every person to whom I am, have been, or will be significant. These children need you and your guidance which will long outlast your presence on this earth. Isn't that what we are here for?